I’m not really the sentimental type when it comes to people biting the dust but I want to take a moment today to recognize The late Buck Adams, who croaked last week. Buck was the man. For many reasons. His ability to fuck was not one of them. He was a marginal performer at best. When he’d pull out to bust a nut on some dead-eyed whore, it was like watching a naked hobo try to milk 2 drops of venom from a baby cobra. It HURT to watch this dude pull one out. When I heard that he shit the bed, I was sure it was because he finally yanked his cock clear off and bled to death.

Why he IS (was) THE MAN, is because of what he was able to do with his life. Here is an average looking dude that can’t fuck that well that was able to GET PAID to fuck the hottest whores of the 80’s, 90’s and even up to the present he was still banging out halfway decent pigs. Another reason is because of HOW he got into the business. His skanky (horse-faced) sister Amber Lynn brought him into the business. His SISTER gave him the opportunity to fuck whores for a living. How sweet is that?

The main reason he is (was) the man was how he lived his life. All he ever did was get paid to fuck bitches, drink, smoke and do drugs AND live to be 52 fucking years old! People may say he that’s young. Fuck those people. Buck Adams did not get cheated. He cheated God out of making him live out the later part of his life unable to do any of the AWESOME things he loved to do. Would Buck have really wanted to be 85 years old, living in assisted living, broke, unable to fuck and get loaded? I doubt it. That fucker squeezed every drop out of life. He packed 85 years of living into 52 years. Let’s see any of you pussies do that!

As a tribute to the legend Buck Adams, I, Jack Hate intend to stay drunk from Friday at 10AM until Monday AM. At various times during the weekend, I will have luke warm sex with several women.

You live with the angels now, Buck.

jack

Or a whore that is just dead inside. Doesn’t matter to me either way.

Meet the oldest Russian whore in excistance Kissa KuntStinko. This beat pig was once a stripper now currently whores herself out as a “Model.”In here case, that is like leaving your job as CEO of a Fortune 500 company to be a contestant on “The Price is Right. ” At least strip clubs are dark. I should have shot this sloppy whore with the lights out too. She may have had the worst tattoos I’ve ever seen on a woman. They looked like her tattoo artist applied them with a paintball gun. Atrocious. She also had fake tits that looked as though she put them in during the car ride to the shoot. I was worried when I saw a picture of them. In real life they looked like someone slid two soup bowls under her skin and weren’t really particular about where they ended up. Her face was nothing to write home about either. Her eyes looked as though she hadn’t slept since the discovery of meth amphetamine. Her skin had the color of coffee ice cream and the texture of a roof shingle. She also kinda smelled like cabbage. Not my favorite model at all.

Kissa the cunt had a few attributes I liked though. She had the ability to take herself to a “Happy place” while i was fucking her up. I love that shit. Just seeing the whore tune out. That’s the shit that gets Jack Hate out of bed in the morning. I auditioned some new dude with her. The guy’s name is Frank or some shit. I renamed him Grizzly because he is a hairy motherfucker. He did ok. He kind of got caught up in the moment and started making fun of dumb Kissa. Who could blame him. To his credit he ignored all the bad things about her and actually tit fucked that beat whore and nutted all over the dumb look on her face. I’ll give him another shot to see if he can actually handle the job. The knucklehead actually brought his girlfriend to the shoot with him. She was a little freaked out to see the kind of stuff in real life but she made it to the end of the shoot without running out. Maybe Grizz will convince her that a career in porn is just the thing she needs! OK that’s it for now.

Out!

Jack

Tune in Monday for all the details if this whore actually shows up. This broad could be interesting. She says she’s 30 which means she’s probably 37 in real life. She has fake tits that look like she had them installed by a blind cobbler. They are pretty big though. i really hope she isn’t a frustrating bitch. I need a nice relaxing Friday.

I may update from the shoot later if I have time.

Later Jerks!

Jack

As you all know by now, I had some shit go down recently. Tough fucking times, but I managed to survive. I learned a lot. Especially who my friends were and weren’t. A good example of a friend would be Jimmy. He would call and see how things were going. He’d also occasionally try to borrow money or ask if I had any spare whores around. But he would always ask how i was doing before trying to scam me out of shit. THAT is a real friend.

An example of a fair weather friend would be “My buddy” That has the blog “EatADump.com. We have been internet friends for awhile. We write back and forth a bit. Nothing too much. Now, when I was away working on the issues that presented themselves to me, did I hear from this JERK? Nope! Not a fucking word. Would it have been nice to just get one email saying “Hey Jack, word on the street is that you’re going through some shit. Anything I can do?” Instead I get NOTHING! WHAT THE FUCK? YOU FUCKING JERK!!!!!!!!!

Fast forward to a couple of days ago. “Hey man, I see that your site is back up and running. Can you plug my new movie?” Huh? I must have missed the part where he wrote “Glad to have you back” or “PLEASE plug my movie” Granted this dude does some good work. BUT do I indulge him and plug his new movie? Yes, I will. You know why? Because I’m ABOVE all the bullshit. I’m a better friend! I just let the shit roll off my back. No big deal. I’m Mr. NO DRAMA. I just get over shit and look to the forward. Not the past. So…

Here’s your FUCKING PLUG, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!

 Everyone please run out and buy this DVD. Never in the history of pornography has someone done something so innovative, so captivating, so earth shattering! From the creative genius, Shameless comes the groundbreaking video “Shameless Amateurs.” What kind of great mind thinks up the concept of hiring amateur whores and paying them to masturbate on video? Shameless, that’s who! I, for one cannot wait to see what he comes up with next! Maybe he’ll hire whores to fuck on video! Bow down to Shameless, the greatest pornographer that ever lived!

 How’s that for a plug, you fucking douchebag!

Jack

Guess who didn’t like being featured on my (tremendously popular) blog yesterday? Bobbi the boob. I was shocked that the dumb bitch could actually read or operate a computer. The dummy could barely operate her skanky snapper. She called me this morning asking me to remove the posting. Yeah ok. I’ll get right on that. She feels quite a bit tougher over the phone than she was in person. She tells me that “you’ll be sorry” if I continue to post shit about her. Fuck that bullshit. I told her that if she had a problem we could settle it with our fists LIKE  ADULTS. She wasn’t so tough anymore. All of a sudden her tone changes and she starts making excuses “I’m a girl. blah blah blah” Whatever. You want to start talking shit, get ready to back it up. End of story. Now, I rarely hit women. Even more rarely will I hit them with my full strength behind the punch or kick. I understand that they need the playing field leveled a bit. I’m more than willing to do that. I will not stand for a whore to talk shit though. I just lose it. I can’t help myself. I’ll go all OJ Simpson on the whore. I think most of you can agree that my behaviour is justified in instances like that. So, fuck her and her stupid demand that I take down that post.

In other news. I have a full weekend of shooting coming up. I had even more whores lined up but the idiot strippers I had planned on shooting on Saturday flaked (as strippers are apt to do.) Hopefully they’ll spend their Saturday getting groped by drunk frat boys with no money at the shithole club they work in. They were both semi beat anyway. One had a great set of tits though. Just enough to distract a viewer from her busted mug. The other one looked like she is on the opposite of a hunger strike. How can you be a stripper and be that fat? I was hoping that when I hired them, I’d be able to shoot the fat one from an angle that was more flattering. Like maybe through a brick wall. Oh well. No loss. Gimme a call when you learn responsibility and you lose 50lbs you fat fuck.

I’ll keep you updated on this weekends shoots. That is if any of these pigs show up.

Out!

Jack 

Meet Bobbi. She’s an idiot. I shot her a couple of weeks ago after she answered one of my ads. 35 minutes into the shoot I was considering switching from a camera to a handgun. What an annoying whore. There was absolutely nothing that was easy enough for her to do without 5 minutes of direction. See the example above.

When I was taking this picture this dummy apparently thought I said “Hey, collapse on the couch like you just worked a doube waiting tables at Denny’s.” Seriously? Who the fuck thinks that is sexy? Is that pose really that complicated that you can’t seem to grasp “lay down on the couch?” She looks as though she was dumped onto the couch from a trash can. This wretched cunt’s only saving grace was that she was a complete fucking pig with no boundaries. This skank would have done a donkey show for $80 if I could have found a donkey with low enough standards to fuck her. We did put her tolerance through the test though. The dude we had fucking her knocked her stupid ass around like she owed him money. He was slapping her across the face so hard that at one point I thought a tooth was going to come flying out of her mouth. That would have been awesome. He also choked her a few times til she turned the purple. I liked it. She didn’t. The scene was exactly what I was hoping it would be. Unenjoyable for her. I don’t think she’ll be back. Whatever though, there are plenty more loser whores to break into the biz.

Out!

Jack

I’m back. Not that any of you fucks missed me enough to even ask where I was. THANKS A LOT YOU FUCKING JERKS! I certainly don’t feel like i owe anyone an explaination but I’ll fill you in anyway. Some of you know that I have had occasional run-ins with the law. Recently I was unjustly accused of punching some fucking ASSHOLE in the face (deservedly so) at a bar that I go to on occasion. Without admitting anything I will say that Yes I punched the fucking pussy in his stupid grill. AND yes I had been drinking and on a few pills. BUT this fucking clown was asking for it. No need to get into the details of me kicking him in his face while he was on the ground unconcious but I’ll tell you this much, That fucking jerk is going to say “excuse me” to the next guy he bumps into!

As part of the resolution of my case, I needed to agree to some barbaric conditions in order to avoid jail time. I had to submit to drug testing for 1 month. Totally unreasonable. Luckily I know of some decent masking agents to get around this BULLSHIT! I also had to go to an anger management type class. Ridiculous. That class pissed me off more than the dude I sucker punched. I bit my tongue and got through it though. Twice a week for 2 hours. It felt like it would never end. I had to repeat one of the classes because I “threw a chair”, which is totally misleading. I actually just tossed it lightly it at this chick that just wouldn’t shut her stupid mouth no matter how much I glared at her. I did manage to finish the class though. The last condition was writing an apology to the guy I beat up. This was the easiest part. I just paid a whore I know to write some shit up. Done done and done.

FREEDOM!

While all this shit was going down, I also had some other more serious shit in the works. I signed a deal with a pretty big company that wanted to put out my awesome work. The site will basically feature me shooting amateur whores and initiating them into the industry. I’ve already begun shooting and the results are terrible. Well, my part is fantastic. Of course, I can’t count on anyone else to keep up their end of the bargain. Everyone from my cameraman (idiotboy) Jimmy to the retarded whores that can’t even remember to bring their fucking shoes to the shoot seem to be against me. Somehow I manage to make it work though. I’ll be posting reports on here as well as updating you on all this new shit. I’ll let you all know when the site launches and all that good shit.

Lastly, I still think Nick Manning should hang himself.

Out!

Jack

The dark haired cunt that I met at 8 Minute Dating’s name was Angel. She turned out to be anything but. Here’s the deal. I call the her up on Thursday and tell her that we’re going out on Friday. She starts playing it off like she has some “other” plans already. I tell her that she should immediately delete my number from her phone if she is going to already start playing fucking games. I don’t need that stupid shit. Naturally she tells me she’ll reschedule her phony fucking plans for later. Whatever. She starts giving me some shit about not calling her the day after we met like I had promised. That’s why she made plans.

Me: You are really starting to bring me down with all this talk about my broken promises. Promises are for the weak. I don’t PLAN shit. I just LIVE shit. If you can’t deal with that then hit the fucking road.

Angel the nag: Sorry. I was just saying. It’s not a big deal.

Me: Can we please just fucking move on? where are you taking me tomorrow?

Angel the nag: Well… there’s a loft party I was invited to. We could do that.

Me: Will there be any pussy there?

Angel the nag: What do you mean?

Me: Pussy. Good looking broads. Sluts. Whores. Chicks. Cum Dumpsters.

Angel the nag: I thought this was a date. You and me.

Me: You are awful fucking clingy. We’ve never even been on a fucking date and your putting all these fucking restrictions on me? You are one warped fucking broad. No wonder you have to go to dating events to get a man.

Angel the nag: I just thought we would hang out and get to know each other.

Me: Oh yeah, so that you can try to change me into some fucking zombie dude? No thanks, you creepy fuck.

I just hung up and made myself a gin and tonic and sat down to try to calm down. These broads think they can do anything they fucking want. MEN have trained them this way. “Please control my life because you have a pussy!” Fucking idiots. Not me. I’d rather fuck porn whores the rest of my life than put up with that shit.

I just sat there on my couch getting more and more pissed off and buzzed. I finished what was left of the bottle of Bombay Sapphire. Bored, angry and horny, I decided to call Angel and set things straight.

Me: We got off on the wrong foot earlier. I’m willing to give you another shot to make this right.

Angel the nag: I’m not sure how it got messed up but I’m willing to try again.

Me: Here’s what you are going to do. I want you to come over my apartment to talk right now. Stop on the way and pick up a box of rubbers and a bottle of Bombay Sapphire gin.

Angel the nag: um. Ok.

I tell her my address and lay back down on the couch. I accidentally dozed off. When I woke up it was 3 hours later and my cell had 7 missed calls. All of them from Angel (I knew this whore was clingy.) Apparently she came by and rang the buzzer and I didn’t hear it. She waited for awhile until someone let her the building and she came up to my apartment and knocked on the door. I must have slept through that. I must have really been tired. Anyway, the last message she left, she was crying and called ME and asshole. As if I MEANT to fall asleep and miss out on some new pussy. She was nothing but trouble anyway. fuck her.

I never called her back. I knew it would only lead to her being a big disappointment. This is the kind of shit you get when you deal with civilians. They’re all kinda fucked in their own way. The one good thing about the evening was when I went to leave my house on Friday morning, there was a new bottle of gin and a full box of rubbers in front of my door!

My date with an Angel was a complete failure but Saturday’s date with the blonde (Kristina) was just a fucking nightmare. More on that tomorrow.

Out!

Jack

What a fucking week. As you could probably tell, I didn’t have much time to update the blog this past week. I barely found the time to call out that fucking creepy omelette cooking weirdo Porn Dan. I could not let that fucking faggy shit pass without commenting. Anyhow, I have a lot of shit to get to this week. I went out with both those fucking whores from 8 Minute dating this weekend. Both were fucking disasters, as you would imagine from them going to that stupid thing in the first place. If you are a semi-hot piece of ass and you NEED to go shop yourself to strangers at a dating event, there HAS TO BE something really fucked up about you. I’ll get into the dates tomorrow.

 I also spent the last week negotiating with a very large company that want me  to develop some websites for them. Obviously, this companies have the good sense to want to work with me. The fucked up thing is trying to get anything moving faster than a fucking snail’s pace. What the fuck is the hold up on every fucking issue? My past issues with the law have all been resolved, so I can’t see why we need to rehash that stuff at every fucking meeting. I’ve agreed to all the anger management bullshit. LET IT FUCKING GO, YOU FUCKING CUNTS!!!!! This is getting ridiculous. I understand the money we agreed to was quite a bit more than you pay other producers, but you get what you pay for. I’m sure Metallica gets paid a bit more than Los Lobos when they are booked for a show. Quality. It’s all about the quality. Can we please get this fucking shit done so I can get on with my FUCKING LIFE?

In addition to all that bullshit. I think I may be self destructing too. I blacked out Saturday night until Sunday afternoon. Not that blacking out is uncommon for me, but I can’t seem to locate anyone that knows what I did and where I was. I started drinking Saturday morning after my workout. I added a few vicodin into the mix before I went out with the dummy from 8 Minute Dating. The last thing I remember is yelling at her on the sidewalk in front of the restaurant and then waking up about 15 hours later in my place. My phone was smashed off of a wall and I had dried blood on my knuckles. My CC had charges from 3 bars that I have no recollection of going to. One of them was a titty bar. Pretty fucked up. I think I better lay off the booze until late afternoons from now on.

Well there ya have it. You fucking jerks are pretty much caught up to date. I’ll fill you fucks in on my dates tomorrow. Hopefully I’ll be able to give you some news on the business front too.

Out!

Jack

Porno Dan. You Suck.

Good fucking God.

I just read the following on XXXPornTalk.Com

This Wednesday World Renowned Director Jim Powers will be shooting his most romantic movie yet, as Ami Emerson will dine on a 70 man cum omelet. Powers, fresh off his win for producing the couple scene of the year at the iPorn Sexopolis Sunset Strip Awards aid, “I feel inspired to produce something every couple in love should be able to watch together. What better way to spend a romantic night than cuddling on the couch, watching a sweet young girl, eating a 70 man cum omelet.”
blah blah blah
Powers went on a nation wide search to find one man sick and twisted enough to be the chef to cook all the cum. He realized there was only one man out there who us up to the task, “Porno” Dan Leal. Leal stated, “I am truly honored to be given the task of cooking the cum. Guys please come on down and drop a load for this record breaking effort. It’s a great way to make a quick buck, plus I am going to be casting for some new reality sites. This could be your big chance to break into porn.”

blah blah blah

I cannot take another fucking second of this Porno Dan retard. Is there nothing you won’t do for attention? I’ve been meaning to write about how much I fucking loathe you since your birthday party and Sexopolis attention whoring threads on XXXPornTalk. That’s not to say I started hating you then. My hate goes back much further than that. Christ, you are an annoying fucking tool. Please take your ridiculous act elsewhere. It’s been great laughing at you over the years but I think it’s time to move on to someone new. Now you are no longer someone to ridicule for fun, now you’re just making people mad.

I have to address your involvement in hetero porn as it seems like an odd fit for someone as fruity as you. Watching you fuck broads is as out of place as Stephen Hawking auditioning for Dancing With The Stars. What I’m trying to say is … you look like a pickle smoocher. Totally. I mean seriously. Everyone thinks it. Has anyone actually mentioned it to you? Dude, I have fabric softener that is rougher around the edges than you are. Now this cooking the omelette thing. WTF? Nothing slightly gay about standing over a hot stove with a pan full of jizz cooking in front of you? I assume you’ll be wearing an apron to hide your erection. I can totally see you tasting it for seasoning and people gagging while you respond “What’s the big deal? It’s just cum!” I’m seriously disgusted by you.

In addition to what I mention previously, I also hate everything else about you. Specifically, your phony life of the party persona. Your “I love women” schtick. Dan, you love women so much because you practically are one! BTW, you are not an overgrown frat boy. I’m sure the closest you’ve come to being a frat boy was jacking off thinking about frat boys.

Also, your hair is stupid.

Lastly, So is your dumb domain “TheLittlePenisThatCould” it really should be TheLittlePenisThatNeedsAttention”. Get some help, fuckface.

Jack